From diont@cs.mun.caSat Nov 18 21:30:51 2000 Date: Thu, 1 Jun 2000 14:39:34 -0230 From: Kobanal Bcc: owsf2000@eudoramail.com Newsgroups: alt.fan.sailor-moon Subject: [OW!] Skuld to the Rescue Previously on Otaku Wars! * Sailor Earth forgot herself when hit by a strange ignorium buster and became Sailor Jake. * Kobanal and Brutus are trying to occupy Kane's spirit. * Amichanians are getting ready to invade the Arty-P, which is now almost the size of the Makochanian's IO-Omega. That's right, just a tad smaller than a small moon. ^_^ This particular post only involves Kane Magus, his body, Kobanal, Brutus, and Skuld. Kane Magus wrote: > Kobanal nodded and looked up at his companion. Then he noticed > what was above Brutus. > > "Um, Brutus, whatever you do... Don't. Look. Up." Brutus, > unfortunately, was hanging by a thread from Kane's kilt (yes, > he's still wearing the kilt ^_^). The thread, to Kobanal's > horror, was unraveling. > > Speaking of Kane, the Endymionsamaian leader had taken full > charge and was handling the situation in a most level-headed > manner. > > "Mommymommymommymommymommymommymommymommymommymo... Hey wait, > you're not mommy!" > > Kane looked up at Skuld, who was standing at the top of the newly > formed hole in the wall. She put her hands on her hips and tsked. > > "Sheesh. Must I do *everything* myself?" "No, I'm not your mommy." Skuld continued, "Hang on while I get you all back inside safely." With that, the young goddess pulled out a big fancy gun with lots of blinking buttons. "AAAAHHHH! DON'T SHOOT!" Kane screamed as she pulled the trigger, sending out three large rocket-powered plungers connected to the gun itself with long elastic cords. "EH?" Kobanal eh-ed in surprise as a plunger slammed into his back. Kane added his own "AH!" as another plunger plopped onto his ass. "MMPH!" Brutus gasped as the plunger intended for him found its mark on his face. "Just a second." Skuld sweatdropped and pressed another button on top of the gun, causing a fishing-rod's reel to pop out of the side. "My ingenious Plunger Retrieval System 3000 can't POSSIBLY fail." "I'll believe that when I see it." Kobanal sweatdropped. (Un)fortunately, nothing went wrong and all three otaku were safely dragged inside the station once more. "Now, is everyone ok?" Skuld asked. "Except for the kilt..." Brutus shuddered. "Kilt?" she blinked, then looked over her shoulder to see Kane picking up his body. "Oh no you don't!" Kobanal growled, and tackled the bald Endymionsanaian's feet. "Oh come ON!" Kane Magus whined, "Its MY body! Let me have it back already!" "And ruin our plans? No way friend!" Brutus replied as he ran ahead and hefted the body over his shoulder, "Skuld, why didn't you keep heading for Central Core?" "I DID keep heading for it." Skuld sweatdropped and clubbed Kane in the head as she stepped over him. "It's just that the entire station was restructured from that growth ray a week ago! I can't FIND it!" "I'm going with Skuld, Freak." Brutus shouted back to the lupine, "Try to keep Kane off our back until we can find Central Core, kay?"[1] "I'm not a FREAK!" Kobanal shouted, then found Kane's elbow in his face, "OW! But keep going, I owe this pip-squeak some more payback." Skuld and Brutus ran down the corridor and turned a corner leaving Kobanal to deal with Kane Magus' tangible spirit with the help of several Minpirian Security Officers. The two Otaku squared off, each brandishing their weapons. One overanxious NO leaped at Kane with a blood-curdling scream. One clean swing of his scythe, and the NO fell headless through the hull breach. "Hey," Kobanal inquired, "Shouldn't there be a force field or something over that. I mean, without one shouldn't there be..." Yup. The Named Ones sweatdropped, then grabbed onto the nearest anchored object as the vacuum of space (finally) began sucking everything out into space! "AAH! Minako save me!" all of the Security Officers screamed in unison as they were instantly killed from the icy chill of space. "AAARRGH!" Kane and Kobanal groaned, holding on to their weapons that they had dug into the floor. "CAN SOMEONE PLEASE TAKE CARE OF THIS!?" Kobanal screamed. Suddenly, and for no discernable reason, the vacuum just stopped. *bee-boo* =Force Field erected, everything is super!= the computer said musically. As Kane and the dog were regaining their footing, Brutus and Skuld ran back into the corridor from the other direction. "Damnit." the minakochanian carrying the body muttered as he ran past Kane once more. "I told you to take a right!" Skuld complained, slamming Kane with her mallet as she passed. Soon, they were gone, and Mord put the keyboard down before Ortheo realized he had added more to the post. Kobanal sweatdropped at Skulds' sudden reappearance, then grinned evilly when he saw Kane lying face down on the floor. "Damn Minakochanians," Kane was swearing, "cowards always attacking from behind..." Kane saw the point of the Thundersword pointed at him. "Well," Kobanal chuckled, "I'm not Minakochanian." The lupine promptly blasted Kane with a bolt of lightning, sending the Endymionsamian flying down the corridor, amid screams of obscene profanity. The lupine quickly chased after his target, his eyes glowing slightly. TBC -- Dionysus & Kobanal The Mako-Minpire Alliance shall prevail! Footnotes: [1] Robin demanded to be the one to kick Kane's ass this post. :)